In my drunk haze last night while celebrating my 10 year business owner anniversary I decided to take action in one area of my life – my love life! I’ve been properly single for over 10 years, a bit of a coincidence that it’s the same time as I’ve run a business! I’ve had a few short flings in the intervening year but not found the one…
After a few glasses of wine I downloaded two dating apps and set up my profile on both and started swiping left and right! By the end of the evening I’d matched with a couple of people and received a couple of messages, it was late by this time so thought I’d leave it to this morning to reply.
However, in the cold light of the day I realised that this was a step too far for me and just the thought of having to reply to messages brought me out in a cold sweat and made me feel quite stressed so less than 12 hours later my profile and apps were deleted off my phone.
Like with every area of my life that I’m working on during this year of transformation, embracing love is right up there as important for me but I know that I have some work to do on this, especially around my self confidence, self worth and self love.
As much as I want to find the love of my life, I’m also a little scared of it and know that I put great big walls up or make excuses why I can’t make more action in this area to move me forward, the deleting of dating apps is a casing point. I can’t quite put my finger on what I’m so scared about, this definitely needs exploring more.